So I failed at the whole 250 words a day thing. It was going well.. for all of like, a week. I have had this idea for a novel in my head for eons. Since like fucking sophomore year of high school. But I mean, who am I kidding? The only way that it will ever get fully written is when I'm in one of my inspirational modes which I think I am currently on an artistic/ lazy curve. I drew a pic of lady gaga which was the best tablet drawing of mine to date but besides that.. not much output from me since last semester.
I go back to school soon. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that... I think I might have a love hate relationship with Oberlin. My friends are pretty awesome. My job is pretty awesome. Everything else... well, lets just say it varies. Though everyone says that the first year is the worst and it only gets better (why am I not surprised considering the freshmen get the bottom choice for like, everything) I don't want to be too hopeful.
Since I got rejected a second time from the Creative Writing department I'm not sure when I will make my next attempt to break in. Maybe I will just attempt to bypass level 2 and take classes with level 3 professors who don't approve of the selective system. The thing that bothers me the most is that I really, really tried. I mean I wasn't just like.. hmm.. heres some stories just chilling here in my desk. Lemme just quick put those together and hand it in. HELL NO! I was like, okay here are a bunch of stories I wrote for class, but I need to edit them. I edited them once from the advice I had, then I referenced back with one of the TA's for the class and she gave me feedback 3 TIMES and I edited my crap after every time she gave me feedback. Apparently nobody cares about effort there, though. It's just a basis of sheer talent and lack of space.
This other guy I know only edited his crap once and got in. I mean really, world. What the fuck.
Honestly though, creative writing isn't practical. Neither is like half the majors at Oberlin, but that's because the major at Oberlin doesn't really matter. You can basically go there and afterward go into whatever the hell you want because nobody really cares. They're just all googly eyed that you graduated from there I guess? I'm not really sure how it works, but it probably has something to do with the fact that Oberlin is a liberal arts school so everyone just assumes you know enough of everything that it doesn't really matter what you do.
So since I seem to be topic hopping (I'm not this ADD in real life, I swear) I am also nervous because I'm taking like 16 credits and working next year. I know a lot of people from last year who took 16 credits and didn't fare well with a job. True, they weren't always very organized about it all, but still. I like having a little free time on the side. I don't enjoy killing myself.
So 16 credits for a university isn't really a big deal but 16 credits at Oberlin is the most you're allowed to take. Unless you're a double degree student (essentially you're brilliant and getting a music degree from the conservatory plus a normal college degree) in which case you can take up to 18.. don't quote me on that though.
Also I'm taking math. It's not that I sucked at math in high school.. but I mean, I took some honors or whatever but nothing major. I don't even know if I remember anything now. Plus there's computer science to add to the list. I enjoyed all the computer science classes I've taken already, but that doesn't mean I'm not a little nervous. This class will be more intense and math-y too.
So of course if I'm taking two classes like that I absolutely MUST have some art to balance it out. So I'm taking this typography-esque design class which is fantastic but I can't decide if I should take another art class too. What I don't like about the art classes is critique. It takes probably 2 and a half hours to get through each persons opinion about your work. Plus you always have to come up with some kind of meaning behind the piece.
I like artwork with meaning, but I hate making up meaning when I just wanted to make something pretty. Why is making something pretty such a horrible thing? Why must I have a whole back story? As far as hearing everyone's opinion: lets be honest. Sometimes it's nice to hear peoples opinions but other times they're either too harsh, or they're just making shit up. Or maybe I'm too sensitive. Art is one of those things where if I've worked on something for the past month its kind of hard to just sit there and take serious criticism.
I am excited to see all my friends again. It's kind of lonely in Cleveland where I know nobody except my parents and one other person who is about a 45 minute drive away. It's amazing how little they keep in touch over the summer, but I guess it makes me more excited to see them when school starts again. One of my friends practically disappeared off the face of the earth. She never checks her facebook, doesn't respond to e-mails, and well.. she's kind of a cave woman at times. I just hope she's hanging out with her friends at home and not just sitting at her house being antisocial.
Topic hop: dorms! I am going to be in a single... did I say this already? Whatever, but my room is freaking huge! I haven't measured it yet but I swear its at least 12 by 12 feet which compared to the normal singles is mega gigantic. It's going to be awesome having so much space to myself, especially since there will be less distractions. I'm not a library girl, I prefer working in my room. I also like that my dorm, Russian House, is farther away from main campus so it's quieter and people are more chill I think. Also since my room is nice and big and I'm bringing forms of entertainment and I can clean, my room can then be the hang out spot among my friends (not that nobody at Oberlin cleans, it's just that I'm one of the cleaner people I know, but hey I'm Russian and my family is a bunch of clean freaks). I think this will make me feel more in control of stuff.
I like feeling like I have control, because a lot of times I feel like things are spiraling out of my control. It gets like that when you have to move due to parents job changes. Or maybe that's just me.
Ugh. I am just so over my life right now. I think I am going to peace out now.
2 comments:
Seriously, I got into my first workshop on my third try—*third*—and didn't get into another workshop until another year after that. And I tried hard. So the creative writing department hated me. So what?
I'm an Oberlin Blogger. And I'm taking a private reading with a creative writing professor (a *famous* creative writing professor, I might add). *And* I have a Creative Writing minor as of this year (yes, validation!). I've talked to you about this before, but I'll reiterate: getting into the major, not getting into the major—it's no big deal. The department is so tiny, the way they select people for classes may as well be random. You can still do writing and you can still be successful at it.
Write often. That's the obvious rule. Take the 200 level classes and be pushy in them—let the professor know you exist and form a connection. Go see them during office hours and email them on weekends. Ask to have tea with them in the summers. You'll be fine.
Good luck with 16 credits. I've done that several semesters in a row and it just about killed me. But I'm not the most competent at organizing my time.
Look forward to seeing you soon!
Thanks for the words of advice, Harris. And for reading so many of my posts ^_^ probably I just need to write more and stop complaining haha. I also look forward to seeing you (honestly I wish I could just move in now) I've heard that Stephen is sticking around for a while longer, is it because they're letting him work for Terrance for another year?
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